The Tolerance Trap

Before discussing how our relationship between tolerance and values has become confusing and intertwined in the last 50 years, it is important to provide a definition of both terms.

Tolerance is a human being’s ability or willingness to endure something outside of the usual realm like extreme amounts of noise, cold, heat, or even physical pain. However, tolerance also includes the ability or willingness to allow, accept, or endure the existence of other people’s opinions or behavior that one does not necessarily agree with.

Is there a correlation between no longer teaching values clarification (moral and ethical) in our schools and the decreasing number of Americans regularly attending church?

Values refer to the personal standards by which a human being measures his or her own behavior and/or the behavior and opinions expressed by others. These standards may or may not include religious values.

Every human being has limits to the amount of deviation from social norms they can accept or handle (i.e., tolerate). However, just like the proverbially frog placed in a kettle of cool water, one’s tolerance can be slowly increased as the temperature of the water in the pot on the stove increases. The primary way that happens (i.e., temperature increased) in current society is through shaming, name calling, and exclusion from the group (i.e., cancelling). Because Americans have totally dropped the ball on teaching anything about values or virtue in our public school system, we have raised several generations of individuals far more worried about being liked and admired than in doing the right thing for God and Country.

“One of the greatest disasters of our time is our universal acceptance of the word tolerance as a great virtue.” ~ Zig Ziglar

In the first 200 years in America, values education and values clarification were taught to children in public and private schools. This was easily accomplished in those days because every classroom had at least one copy of the Christian Bible, which was also often used as a textbook. However, the importance of teaching moral values to school age children began to diminish in America in the late 1800s and finally disappeared altogether from public schools in the early 1970s.

Also, in the 1970s, the number of American’s attending church on a regular basis began to decline. In the mid-20^th century, about 70% of Americans attended church weekly. By 2020, only about 20% of Americans attend church weekly. I believe there is a correlation between no longer teaching values clarification (moral and ethical) in our schools and the decreasing number of Americans regularly attending church.

“Don’t get so tolerant that you tolerate intolerance”

In the early 1960s, American colleges and universities began offering classes in what was called “situation ethics.” Essentially, these courses taught moral relativism, which suggests that moral standards are not universal but instead shaped by cultural and societal contexts. In other words, these courses taught that there are no absolute standards of right or wrong. For many who bought into this concept of situation ethics, they concluded they could do whatever they wanted, if they were willing to live with the consequences of their choices and to hell with individual moral responsibility.

“Don’t get so tolerant that you tolerate intolerance.” ~ Bill Maher

In a recent blog post, the lead pastor at Seymour Christian Church in Seymour, Indiana, Steve Bruce observed that “misplaced tolerance makes us comfortable with compromise.” And becoming too comfortable with compromise, especially regarding our culture and Judeo-Christian values, can be dangerous. 

The old adage that if you don’t stand for something, you will fall for anything comes to mind.

In Romans 12:14-18, St. Paul describes how Christians should live. He speaks in plain language everyone can understand. In Verse 18, St. Paul says, “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone” (NIV). St. Paul advises living peaceably with all, while also being aware of false teachings. In other words, our tolerance and acceptance of others should be rooted in love and understanding, while we also stand firm in our Christian beliefs and values.

Learning to “live peaceably with all” has become increasing more important, and certainly far more difficult, for all peace-loving people as our world grows more diverse culturally, socially, and politically.

We the People must return to a time of honesty and virtue

When I was a licensed mental health professional interacting with clients in my office, I had a fairly high tolerance for aberrant behaviors and extreme belief systems. If I was to be of help to them professionally, I needed to understand their thinking process and what drove their behavior. However, in my personal interactions with other people in my life, especially as I’ve grown older, my tolerance limits are much narrower and better defined. While I always attempt to interact with all people with kindness and compassion, I can, as a private individual, choose who I associate with, how often, and under what circumstances.

If America is to survive as “a shining beacon on a hill” as former President Ronald Reagan was fond of saying, We the People must return to a time of honesty and virtue, and perhaps painfully, examine our own values and actions daily. Are our personal beliefs, values, and actions life-giving or life-diminishing? Do we know what our personal priorities are and are we willing to stand up for our beliefs and values in the light of criticism or threats of personal harm?

There are many loud, angry, and misguided voices out there screaming at those of us who are Christian conservatives, who want to Make America Great Again (and Canada Great Again). We are called intolerant, hateful, and even evil by “the crazies” on the Left. We need to ignore those voices trying to shame or silence us, and continue to stand for Truth with a capital T. During his time on earth, Jesus set the example of how to live peaceably with all. Jesus always demonstrated love and compassion for the persons he encountered, but not for their sin.

Practicing tolerance can become a trap

In conclusion, practicing tolerance can become a trap when it shifts from a respectful acknowledgement of differing beliefs to an uncritical acceptance of all views, regardless of their validity. Traditionally, tolerance meant respecting others’ beliefs without necessarily agreeing with them.  However, in today’s world, “practicing tolerance” literally demands that all beliefs be seen as equally valid, which certainly compromises the concept of truth. Sadly, in some contexts, demonstrating tolerance has evolved into acceptance of behaviors and/or beliefs that are actually harmful, and we see many examples of this in daily news reports.

I’m sure the good people of Minnesota originally thought they were doing God’s work in welcoming the Somalia population into their state in very large numbers. (I have strong family ties to Minnesota, and I know how kind and caring Minnesotans can be.) However, I don’t believe anyone in the general population of Minnesota ever thought that there would be rampant welfare fraud, Medicaid abuse, and other nefarious and reprehensible activities taking over their state coffers and continuing to be perpetuated because state officials were either too afraid to blow the whistle when they found things amiss financially or too personally involved to want to stop the criminal activity. It is not tolerant or honorable to turn a blind eye to criminal activity of any group, whether they be legal American citizens or those here in “a protected legal status” of some sort.

“Politics and morality are inseparable. And as morality’s foundation is religion, religion and politics are necessarily related. We need religion as a guide. We need it because we are imperfect, and our government needs the church because only those humble enough to admit they’re sinners can bring to democracy the tolerance it requires in order to survive.” ~ Ronald Reagan

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