Two-Fisted Security Officer Won Mardi Gras Fight

I visited a pharmacy security officer this morning I haven't seen since before getting sick last year. He's got a heart of gold-and hands like steel, an example of which he shared with me.

During Mardi Gras Day 2026, officially known as 'Fat Tuesday,' he had a run-in with a young tough guy visiting from Louisiana's state capitol.

The talkative tourist made the mistake of 

A. Threatening to kill my friend, the security officer, whose resume includes street fighting and bodyguard work for high-risk rappers. Additionally, the threat could be considered simple battery, a misdemeanor charge in this state and 

B. Pushing him, which is another misdemeanor simple battery charge in this state. Self-defense is allowed by law-and company policy-in these instances. And it was on! (Lol).

A flurry of blows and a bloodied, knotted face later, the young tough guy saw the error of his ways. This was a textbook example of sudden, life-or-death situations 'public-facing' professionals, to use a new term, navigate in the workplace.

Years ago, I had a simple battery charge eventually placed on a death threat maker against me, after I intense political and publicity arm-twisting. He was eventually arrested. In cities like New Orleans, it's best to bring consequences to its surplus of big mouthed malcontents. You never know when another viral assault or murder may happen as a result.

I gave him some granola bars and bid this two-fisted security officer adieu. The fight he won on Mardi Gras Day was definitely a victory for the good guys, you know, the only ones always told to de-escalate.

No one ever tells 'escalators' like this defeated death-threat maker to de-escalate. It would've saved him some lumps.

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